@WheelTod: Remember kids -- it may be illegal to text and drive; but you can still lawfully handwrite someone a heartfelt letter at 50mph.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@RidiculousSheri: Yelp Review: Babies Cute at first, but then screamy like angry pterodactyls. There is literally poop everywhere. Would not recommend.
@adult_keverage: Do you know what's cooler than those fake chains around your license plate? Everything. Every single thing in the world.
@_ElvishPresley_: [commercial for boiling water] *enemies at castle wall are splashed with cool refreshing water* castle guard: there must be a better way!