@Momfia: Remember ladies: when a guy says "I'm listening" what he means is "I bet if Godzilla had machine guns for arms he'd of been unstoppable".
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@KalvinMacleod: [inventing flies] GOD: make them eat shit ANGEL: got it GOD: make their babies the grossest things in the world ANGEL: ok who hurt you?
@Ristolable: This is your captain speaking. Would someone who knows how to be a pilot please come up? I'm literally just pressing buttons.
@junejuly12: Funny that when some people go out for 'fresh air', they come back in smelling like 'weed'
@chrissyteigen: I don't like charging my phone on the plane because a large part of me feels like I am sucking energy and power from the engine