@jordan_stratton: Remember--the only thing standing between you and your dreams is your appearance, lack of talent, and general personality.
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@themorris23: And remember kids, when you go to Target, there really is no "non creepy" way to ask where the Vaseline is.
@Elizasoul80: I don't want your undivided attention. I want your multiplied attention. Make clones of yourself and give me all of their attention too.
@jackiembouvier: Thanks, baby Jesus, for helping me get that new job instead of helping millions of children find water and food. I know it was a tough call.