@jlock17: Remember when all bombs looked like a black bowling ball with a giant wick in the top? Yep, simpler times.
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@jimmy_sharpe: Ever accidentally say 'I love you' to important business customers on the phone? Me too. I MEAN ME NEITHER.
@EBenita0517: I'm Puerto Rican, but not "carries a knife in my purse everywhere I go" Puerto Rican. Sometimes it's in my bra.
@RoosterMustache: ME: snakes are mean TEACHER: right ME: but it's not their fault. They have 2 ends & no legs TEACHER: ok ME: so the ends justify the mean
@randomlawless: Men don't ignore us; they have selective hearing. Give them instructions for roasted turkey & they'll remember "breast, thighs, moist & hot"