@RealSamHarwood: Reminding Dad I'm too old for adoption really bums him out because that was one of his favorite threats when I was growing up
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@ibid78: The year is 2072. Numbers have lost all meaning. It could be 3247 for all they know. "It's 5486," says one guy, but it could've been 8 guys.
@TheToddWilliams: STICK BUG WIFE: We can't seem to get pregnant DOC: Well, we ran numerous tests… STICK BUG WIFE: …and? DOC: Your husband's an actual stick
@remmarg_yelsel: I'd definitely watch a show with Dr. Phil going door to door reading people's Google search history out-loud with the most judgmental stare.