@itchyturtle: Rent boat. Go out to sea. Find sperm whale. Tell him he's called sperm whale. Console sperm whale. Have fun with new whale best friend.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Spaziotwat: My wife is terrified of thunderstorms. The banging outside the window is horrendous, but if we let her in she'll just get the dog all wet.
@KattWillliams: Did you know that the new iPhone 5 helps people lose weight? When you pay for it you can't afford to eat for a month.
@J0hnnyBlaze: Home Alone is my favorite movie about how child neglect and bad parenting is hilarious