@dreamthievin: Replace his deodorant with a glue stick so he thinks of you every time he tries to raise his arm to put around the shoulders of another girl
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@sumpeoplelikeit: Whoa there, pregnancy test. You just tell us yes or no and we'll decide if it's positive or negative.
@SCBamaMan: As soon as you see the cop approaching, throw the bag of weed in his hands and do a citizen's arrest.