@dreamthievin: Replace his deodorant with a glue stick so he thinks of you every time he tries to raise his arm to put around the shoulders of another girl
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@BoogTweets: Me: Your hair smells so good. Which shampoo is that? My Boss: This is inappropriate Me: Your skin is so… My Boss:*Turns off shower* OUT!
@RandiLawson: Did U hear they're remaking 'Dirty Dancing' & Miley Cyrus is gonna play the abortion.
@OhNoSheTwitnt: Twitter yesterday: We are outraged about the lion! Twitter today: We are outraged about the outrage about the lion!