@rationalists: Republicans say they're not satisfied with Michele Obama's speech because she didn't give it from her kitchen.
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@SaeedFaridzadeh: Me: When I was a kid we had to wait a week to watch the next episode of our favorite show. Kid: Is that because the Internet was too slow?
@buhsbaby_baby: As a grown woman with no children or morals to slow me down, I will have a definite advantage during tomorrow's family Easter egg hunts.
@animaldrumss: Arnold Palmer: get me a refreshing drink Barkeep: try this, its lemonade and iced tea Arnold Palmer: Mmm... its good... I just invented it.