@pleatedjeans: *requests to be buried in jaws of T-Rex skeleton so it looks like I went out fighting*
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Tacet_no_more: When my wife says "I don't want to talk about it" that's woman code for you better put your life on hold for 2 hours & find out what "It" is
@pixelatedboat: "Hey buddy, you wanna buy a harmonica?" I opened my coat and got hit by a gust of wind, making the worst sound in the world
@4boding: You haven't built just a wall around you; you've constructed a bomb shelter inside a nuclear bunker set into the side of a mountain.
@TheDairylandDon: If I hear people screaming, I always go check on them. Not because I'm nosy or some kind of hero. There might be ice cream.