@measday519: Research says that if you're afraid of spiders, you're most likely to find them in your bedroom. I'm afraid of men with accents so...
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@hippieswordfish: 'sir, no food allowed in the dressing rooms.' what, am i supposed to just guess the pop tart capacity of these cargo shorts before I buy?
@PortRooster: Pitbull: Hey, what rhymes with "Kodak"? Nicki Minaj: "Kodak", duh... Pitbull: Thanks!
@1_swarthy_dude: I asked my wife to pick up some 25yr caulk at Home Depot and she's been in the bathroom getting ready for hours.
@KalvinMacleod: GOD: I've created donuts ANGEL: ooh they're yummy but why the hole? GOD: ANGEL: GOD: ANGEL: because they are holy GOD: because they are holy