@iQuoteComedy: Research shows that in 100% of cases, when someone says "Oh no she didn't!", she in fact, did.
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@totallymel: my grandfather destroyed the economy w/ the overproduction of coins he pulled from behind my ears. the market simply could not deal
@ScorpionDong: Hangs a sign on front door that says "Robbery in progress - Please do not disturb" to deter burglars
@UniqueDude2: [reading book report] ME: Beyowulf is the story of a guy that turns into an wolf when he hears Beyoncé TEACHER: Wrong. ME: Well, I tried.