@cosmicbibi: Research shows your medication is 879% more effective if you drink a 6 pack and a bottle of wine first. Also, I changed my name to Research.
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@LaziestCanine: First date: [ok, don't let her know you're a t-rex] Her: I absolutely love it when guys open the car door for me Me: Shit.
@AmericanGent69: Me: *seductively spreading peanut butter on my chest Sir, you’re going to have to leave. Me: *reluctantly gets off treadmill
@dave_cactus: HUMPTY DUMPTY: Quick, put me back together! TOTO: There's nothing that 100 men or more could ever do. HUMPTY DUMPTY: …maybe call the horses?