@TheTweetOfGod: Retweet this and something good will happen at some point in the near future that you can choose to attribute to having retweeted this.
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@Parkerlawyer: I got a message on Facebook that said, "Your a lawyer, right?" Me, "*You're." May have lost a new client but they learned something today.
@QwertyJones3: Whenever my dachshund acts up I show him a pack of hotdogs in my fridge and he falls right back into line