@kelkulus: Revenge idea if a girlfriend dumps you: sneak into her house, tighten the lids on all her jars.
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@thereverendcink: If I ever only have 3 months to live, I want my ex wife to be with me. That would be the longest 3 months of my life.
@reesespiece_: The door to door bible people just skipped my house! See, all it takes is trying to kiss the guy and he wont be back (until 3am)