@TheTweetOfGod: .@rickygervais Ricky, if you can get Twitter to verify me, you will be the first atheist allowed into heaven.
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@Sean_Burgundy_: I hate when I meet a beautiful woman and have to leave bc someone who beat me in a rap battle is walking my way
@IamSoffWilliams: We all have that special someone in our lives that we wish would get run over by a truck.
@vladchoc: I don't need people. I have potato chips. And unlike people you can enjoy them and then legally throw their crumpled remains into a campfire