@Kid_topher: "Ride or die" seems a bit dramatic. I'm looking for a "ride or maybe go our separate ways if things aren't working out."
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@ruinedpicnic: [Terrorist tears open undercover FBI agent's jacket] Terrorist: FBI? Agent: uhhh Terrorist: hey guys this dude is a Female Body Inspector
@NamestartswithZ: MENTOR: I am now sponsored by Cheetos, but it shan't affect my wise counsel ME: How can I become- MENTOR: Dangerously cheesy? Glad you asked
@bush_piglet: Today I have learnt - if you try and give someone the finger whilst wearing mittens, you are basically just showing them your mittens.