@Kyle_Lippert: Robin Thicke is what would happen if a roofie became a human and decided to make music.
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@OctopusCaveman: If children are the future, we're doomed. Kids suck at a lot of stuff. Have you ever heard a kid read aloud? It's a nightmare.
@murderbytweets: In Hell, someone is constantly vacuuming while you're trying to explain directions to an old man.
@novicefather: I listen to gangsta rap sprinkled with a little Sarah McLachlan. Will I murder you? Will I adopt a puppy with you? You don't know.
@StinkyGr33n: I went to the bathroom and forgot my phone. Had to read the little paper about Toxic Shock Syndrome from the tampon box again