@Jenny4ashley: Romeo and Juliet is my favorite story about how when you fall in love, it's best to just kill yourself.
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@robdelaney: Steve Jobs' entire legacy is invalidated by the shortness of the iPhone charger's cord.
@Elizasoul80: Sometimes I put a vase of flowers outside to let other flowers know that if they try to be prettier than me, I'll cut their legs off too.
@daplusk: Interviewer: give me an example of problem solving Me: i was fired from my last job and now i'm applying for this one