@pixelatedboat: Ronald McDonald kills millions of cows and he's the world's most beloved clown, but I butcher one and I "ruined your son's birthday party"?
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@lamefactory: 911, what's your emergency? What do you mean you've been stabbed? People can't do that, that's illegal.
@Amazon_Blonde: 911 what is your emergency? Me: "My 6 year old hasn't stopped talking since he got home" 911: "stay calm ma.. Me: MY EARS ARE BLEEDING
@jonnysun: even if u realy hate sombody, u shoud never insult their physical apearance!!! bc as soon as u dig deeper u will find much stronger insults
@pleatedjeans: [blind date] So,where you from? [eyes turn black] T h E S E v E n T H C i R C L e O F H e L L Oh nice. ever miss it? [cries blood] Y e s