@SimplyNamedTron: Roses are red, my real name is Dave. This poem makes no sense, microwave.
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@TheToddWilliams: [back from the ultrasound] MOTHER-IN-LAW: So did you see the fetus? ME: Fetus, handus, legus...there was practically a whole baby in there!
@Smooheed: When I'm pushing the twins in the pram and someone asks me if they're mine I say 'no, they're for my collection' and run as fast as I can
@1evilidiot: What's with the attitude? I don't know what's gotten into you but I know what hasn't.