@LuckyPetDeals: RT if you know someone like this!!!
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@corysnearowski: My girlfriend broke up with me. I am devastated. How could you. I did everything. I surprised you with burgers every night
@ObscureGent: Waiting for Bernie Sanders to come out from under the ring and hitting someone with a steel chair to claim the presidential belt.
@SergioValenCo: Leave the past behind. Smile every day. Never wear underwear. I don't know. Inspirational tweets are hard.