@BadJordon: Ruin a hipster's day by telling them how commercial you think their favorite band has become.
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@peetiesays: Diamond engagement rings are so last year. Ask for her hand in marriage by presenting her with a full tank of gas.
@Ophelia_808: [stunned, eyes lock, a smile exchanged, and I knew it was kismet] *hands cash to lady Ma'am my baby isn't for sale. I SAID I'LL TAKE TWO!!
@lloydrang: By age 30, most men have found that one special hairstyle they want to spend the rest of their life with.