@rachelle_mandik: *ruins your party with a can of Serious String*
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@sweet_pea707: HR: Do you know why I called you in here today? Me: I have a boyfriend HR: Ok, sorry to bother you
@lovemyboots111: Apparently asking the boss " who ignited the fuse on your tampon?" will get you sent to HR.
@ohpeetie: 10: What's it like being a grown up? Me [hands her money]: When we get to the movies, buy a large popcorn. 10: This is only $2 M: Exactly
@brianbowman73: Saw someone simultaneously walking while writing on a pad of paper. I yelled at them to text and drive like a normal person.