@KateQFunny: Running out of time to be a Trophy Wife, so now just hoping to be an I Finished The Race Tshirt Wife.
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@caseytduncan: Genie: You have 3 wishes. I don't want to run into spiderwebs anymore. That's it.... I'm done. You can keep the other 2 wishes.
@Audenary: Vicar: The bride and groom have written their own vows. *Everyone lets out a huge groan as Tolstoy reaches into his suit pocket*
@markleggett: I'm using an old Indian trick in order to wake myself up early: Eating several large curries right before bed.
@Home_Halfway: ASTRONAUT 1:So sorry ASTRONAUT 2: My condolences ASTRONAUT 3: Forgive us ~~The crew of the Apollo-G