@slimmy_shady: Sandwich: Hi. Barman: Sorry, we dont serve food in here.
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@rolldiggity: Every Scooby-Doo mystery could be solved by asking, "1: Who is your most disgruntled employee?" and "2: Does he have access to a mask shop?"
@MyPornKhan: Ok, I'll admit it, my choice of words is sometimes influenced by which ones I think I can spell correctly.
@pleatedjeans: [house being raided] [swat guy crashes through window, lands on slip n slide I placed there for this exact reason and slides out front door]
@JGrumbie: Fully clothed mom just waded into the pool to grab her devil spawn child that was ignoring her. She's my new favorite.