@MrWordsWorth: Sarah Palin isn't racist. Some of her white friends' best white friends have white friends who vaguely know someone who is black.
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@tkhan74: I surveyed 100 women and asked them what shampoo they used when showering, 98 of them said, "How the hell did you get in here?"
@ClaytonSykes: Candy Crushers keep inboxing me saying that they need "lives" as if I didn't already know that.
@Brianhopecomedy: I inform my 4 year old that she's going to a friend's house 5 minutes before we leave so she only asks me when we're going 6000 times.