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@abbycohenwl: Cat: Meow Me: Meow Mom: Why do you do that? Me: Silly, huh? Mom: No, reckless! Do you even know what you said? What if you told him he's fat
@TheAlexNevil: *I gently close front door Dog: Where have you been?? I was worried sick about you! See that vomit on the floor? That's because of you!
@Breadery: Dilemma: Your daughter brings home a guy with an Insane Clown Posse t-shirt on but your garden is already completely full of corpses.
@SteveSuckington: Hostess: enjoy these complimentary after dinner mints Mints: you have beautiful eyes Me: [blushing] wow they're very complimentary