@Bearslietoo: Saw a squirrel get hit by a car earlier.Felt kinda bad,but I don't think the squirrel gave a shit that the Smart Car was totaled.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@nthonyswan: Airlines. Graciously giving you the choice to have feet, or a personal item, but not both.
@UberFacts: Research suggests that when someone disagrees with you, you should speak faster so they have less time to process what you’re saying.
@huntigula: her: the manager of the McDonalds down the street called today... him: [sitting on couch next to Ronald McDonald statue] Did he sound mad?