@donni: Saw a werewolf at the bus stop this morning. Or possibly just a very hairy guy. Either way, the silver bullets worked.
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@DaddyJew: Relationship threats: teens: i'll cheat on you 20's: i'll go to the bar with my boys 30's: I'm gonna watch all of our shows without you
@Book_Krazy: Boss: Where were you on Friday? Me: It was a holiday. Boss: HALLOWEEN IS NOT A PAID HOLIDAY! Me: It is if you go as Christmas. Boss:...
@moose_chocolate: "So you spend 6 bucks on a beverage that has no booze in it on purpose?" -me to everyone at Starbucks.