@SciencePorn: Saw this cutie pie on the side of the highway this morning
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Fred_Delicious: Police chief - "I've been hearing reports that one of our cops is an undercover lobster" Me -[struggling to grip coffee mug in huge pincers]
@squirrel74wkgn: I'm not sure who's more drunk, me or the guy wrapped in Christmas lights standing in the mirror.
@seantgreen: One of Jesus' most impressive accomplishments was being 33 years old and still having 12 really close friends.