@RobElliottComic: Say "Literally" and "Legit" a few more times in that sentence so I know it's literally legit
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@iwearaonesie: mom: Why are your eyes red? Are you high!? [flashback to me cry-singing Taylor Swift's "Love Story" in the car on the way over] me: Yes
@KKAlThani: Hello is this NASA? Ya what will happen if the sun decided to come out at night? Is it still called night or morning? Hello?
@EndhooS: [Interview] "Do you have any previous experience dealing with animals?" [flashback to my flatmate leaving toast crumbs in the butter] ..Yes.
@Marlebean: I'm nervous that my diet pill will stick in my throat, so I usually eat a few cookies after to help push it down.