@Sarcasticsapien: Saying "to each his own" is the best way to tell someone you respect their right to have an extremely stupid opinion.
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@lanyardigan: If I ever get the chance to reveal a chupacabra to the world, I hope I have the presence of mind to say, "Chupacadabra!"
@themiltron: [the invention of money] i want your stuff "it's mine tho" what if i gave you a hard circle or a long paper "hmmm"
@TheBoydP: [two coworkers walk into my office] Coworkers: Hey! It's your two favorite people here to ask you a question! Me: Where?
@SoulYodeler: I can see clearly now the rain has gone; I can *backs into mailbox* see all obstacles in my way *runs over squirrel* omg I love this song