@Cpin42: Schrödinger: How’s my cat, Doc?
Vet: I have good news and bad news..
@dubstep4dads: [sees kid crying]
Kid: Im lost
Me: that's ok. We're all lost. Happiness is an illusion. Life is meaningless. Death is around the corner. Bye
@JaneanPatience: Leonard Cohen is jamming in heaven with Prince now. Really awkwardly. It's not going well. Their musical styles aren't compatible
@PFTompkins: Well, time to go to bed & remember that I started and abandoned a huge organizing project that involved putting a bunch of stuff on the bed.
@WheelTod: Better to have loved & lost than to have never loved at all; but if going spelunking was your idea, you should at least *try* to find her.
@SamGrittner: I've honestly never been more disappointed in life than when I found out that the Miami Dolphin football team was made up entirely of people