@dubiousgenius: Scientists say Spider-Man would not be able to climb vertical surfaces due to his size. It's almost like someone made the whole thing up.
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@IamEnidColeslaw: my signature move is called "the Mouse," where I run around the dance floor wearing nothing but a tampon
@chuuew: Cop: Admit it! You killed that family Murderer: You can't prove anything... Cop: You know, you're actually called "Murderer" in this thing
@Underchilde: “There’s no use crying over spilt milk.” Unless you spill it on a winning Powerball ticket, then you should probably cry.
@ohheyitszara: Michael Cera and Jesse Eisenberg bump into each other, say sorry awkwardly, then try to sidestep each other but keep stepping the same way.