@timdonakowski: "Scolding a cat after it does something wrong has been proven ineffective" - cats
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@WhaJoTalkinBout: My walk of shame is to the laundry room to rerun the same load of clothes I keep forgetting to dry for the third time.
@NewDadNotes: [NASA March 1970] Me: 13’s unlucky. What if something bad happens? NASA: dude why would you say that out loud!?! [NASA April 1970] [everyone in the Apollo 13 Mission Control slowly turns to look at me]
@RudeComedian: Me: Mom...Dad. I've decided to live on my own from now on. Parents: ok, cool. Me: Your luggage is outside