@JeremyBRoberts: Scott Walker is dropping out of the Presidential race. In a nationwide poll of likely voters nearly 98% responded to the news with, "Who?"
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@TheToddWilliams: [lumberjack interview] BOSS: I'm gonna "axe" you a few questions. Haha do you get it? ME: Yeah I "saw" that coming BOSS: Ooo welcome aboard!
@lanyardigan: Now imagine how close together the presidents' bodies are, under their Mount Rushmore heads.
@internetluke: [comes out of coma after 12 years] ME: Holy shit I forgot to set my AIM status to 'Away'! DOCTOR: you might want to take a seat