@drewtoothpaste: #SCOTUS one-star review
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@robfee: No one is more unnecessarily confident than a white person that just ordered Mexican food in a Spanish accent.
@TheHatdog: Google Search: -is my toaster broken -can fire ants make toast -bathtub fire, small -house fire, how to stop -is house fire toast a thing?
@CopBroughtPizza: todd: *sobbing uncontrollably* me: relax it was just a little earthquake todd's wife: he's an etch-sketch artist. it was everything he had
@YoungNobler: Underwear isn’t protecting you from your pants. It’s protecting your pants from YOU! Another conspiracy uncovered.