@LizHackett: Screech up to a yard sale. Ask if they have any haunted amulets. Yell at the dog in your backseat, "I'm GETTING the spell reversed, Greg!"
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@Ideal_Victoria: For fun I like to text all the men in my phone, "she has your eyes, can't wait for you to meet her" and then I sit back and wait.
@krisv_723: *Watching tv* Him: wtf are you eating? Me: Cotton candy. *stuffing more in my mouth* The attic is full of it but I think it's stale.
@frankzulla: "Well maybe they shouldn't make soap out of animal fat if they didn't want people to eat it!" I yell from the emergency room, mouth foaming