@MrJeberling: "Screw you, my face doesn't look like that at all" - an actual duck.
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@silent_musings: Next time you see someone you don't like, begin conversation with "I see the assassins have failed."
@causticbob: The kidnapper rang and said "£10,000 and you get your wife back" "Negotiate with him!" advised the policeman "£20,000 and she's all yours"
@rachelaxler: it's cool how the members of Anonymous are so good at computer stuff, but also wrote so many great poems and inspirational quotations.
@SocialustGal13: Really, 6 more inches of snow today. My front yard is getting more action than me.