@JamieDMJ: Sea lions are faster than humans on both land and sea, so if you face one in a triathlon, you really need to make up time on the cycling.
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@jergarl: [praying] Please just send me a sign. Anything. *Ace Of Base starts playing on radio . . . LOL nice
@fuzzlime: sometimes when I finish eating a bag of microwave popcorn I try to eat a couple unpopped kernels just to convince myself it's really over
@Jake_Vig: Whoever keeps dressing our president in golf clothes and putting him in golf carts, please stop, he's trying to make phone calls and work.