@BillMc7: Seems like Hello Kitty should be a brand of condoms.
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@GrantTanaka: Txt from wife: where r u Me:kitchen Wife:can u feed cat M: I mean garage W:bring in laundry M:bathroom W:clean toilet M: Idaho W:get potatos
@amishschool: Offered the kids $5 to clean so they could learn about money and then didn't pay them so they could learn about randomly trusting people.
@AlexReekie: There’s plenty more fish in the sea “Actually we’ve 5% the tuna we once had. 10% of sharks. 5% of cod” I’m bad at consoling dumped friends
@batkaren: Ghostbusters (1984): A large, jovial marshmallow sailor is burned alive amid the crossfire btwn humans and ethereal beings.