@CornOnTheGoblin: [sees co-worker the next day after failing to kill him on purge night] mondays am i right?
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@WilliamRodgers: *Reads about a Salmonella outbreak on lettuce -NEVER eats Salad again! *Reads about the dangers of Alcohol poisoning -NEVER reads again!
@girl_a_whirl: I've reprogrammed my FitBit to allow for more me time. And by reprogram, I mean I've attached it to the leg of a deer. I was born to run.
@5hael: I think I'm a genius.... I just solved a rubiks cube so fast! It only took me 5 minutes and 25 seconds to peel off all the stickers.