@PajamaBenLaden: *Sees old 1987 ford mustang and gets in* Lets see if this baby still works *pulls baby out of backpack* *baby cries* Great! *Puts it back*
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@lovstructionist: Football Team: Huddle up! Me: Mm, this is nice FT: Who are you Me: So warm, so snug FT: Break. Break now! Me: Don't go nice man-castle
@FunnyCauseImFat: At 1am I'm going to wake up my 2 year old by yelling his name and crying. Then, I'll crawl into his toddler bed. Let's see how he likes it.
@jenlaw_11: Mom I'm running away! No I don't need a jacket! Mom no I'm fine I don't need a jac- mom! No I don't need you to pick me up later mom! MOM!
@Zombie_Kit: Scary shit happens in horror movies at 3am. So when hubby woke up screaming with a leg cramp at 3am, I threw the bible at him.