@Ristolable: Seize the day. Attack the week. Murder the month. Approach your life in a generally violent way.
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@DrDogMD: PATIENT: Doc, I haven't been able to bone my wife lately and I really think- DR DOG: Wait. Tell me more about the bone part
@dulcetry: This Walmart is advertising $9.99 iPads to anyone who throws their baby into a snakepit.
@DannyZuker: I just watched a 15 year old girl who was busy texting walk into a light post and I am no longer an atheist.