@SincerelyMen: "Seize the day" in Latin is "Carpe Diem" ..."Seize the day" in Douchebag is "YOLO"
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@jergarl: Wife:How'd you sleep? Me: Fine except I got in a gun fight and died and went to the store because I ran out of shampoo W: Ambien:*giggles
@badbanana: There's no sticker warning me not to eat this box of nails so I guess I'll just go for it.
@awordforaword: "Are you listening to understand or to be right?" ~ sometimes pretending to listen results in unexpected mutiple choice questions