@Tw1tter_K1tten: Sent my husband to work with leftovers from dinner last night. His co-workers are going to be so jealous of his bowl of cereal.
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@heidi420x: I'm not interested in your cat unless it's on its 8th life and about to do something incredibly stupid.
@THEDUTHCHESS: Day 1 of being kidnapped. Kidnappers are now offering my husband a ransom to take me back. Husband is asking for more money.
@lilgapeach30: It's like my daddy always says...if you can't beat 'em, arrange to have 'em beaten.