@Tw1tter_K1tten: Sent my husband to work with leftovers from dinner last night. His co-workers are going to be so jealous of his bowl of cereal.
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@krismuscookie: The WHICHING hour: when I lay awake in the wee hours labouring over which comebacks I should have used in every argument I've ever had.
@bencoffeehall: Ooh. Remove card RAPIDLY, not RABIDLY. I think I owe the lady at pump 2 an apology.
@Reverend_Scott: SON: What will happen when I die? DAD: Well son, you know how all dogs go to heaven? SON: YA- DAD: You're not a dog.