@SCbchbum: Seriously, if I were a manager at Burger King, my answer to every complaint would be, “You’re at Burger King.”
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@chopper4jk: When people put pics of their vacation on FB I write: I saw fire trucks outside your house but I'm sure you already know, have a great time!
@MableGertrude: It's funny how you think it's your cat leaving all those dead birds on your doorstep.
@KalvinMacleod: I accidentally took an extra step when I reached the top of the stairs and now I'm in a marching band.