@notalogin: Sex is like lasagna - there's absolutely no reason for it to involve spinach in any form.
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@mrjohntofu: My signature move is parking closely to the sports car at the end of the lot taking up four spaces.
@sammyrhodes: My leg brushed against the toilet in a Starbucks bathroom. Goodbye leg. You were a good leg.
@Book_Krazy: Me: What's with the look? Hub: How would you like a full-service massage? Me: I would, but will you and the kids be okay while I'm gone?