@notalogin: Sex is like lasagna - there's absolutely no reason for it to involve spinach in any form.
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@iAmDelFreaky: I was practicing moves on a stripper pole, when all of a sudden I heard a loud ringing. Then 3 firemen fell from the sky and crushed me.
@treydayway: I stopped trying to be a thug when I found out there was something called a caramel Frappuccino.
@VaultsOpen: My 6 year old nephew is legitimately pissed off that there is no actual monkey in the monkey bread.