@baeblacksheep: Sex so good the peeping Tom made sandwiches.
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@MoistPork: My only fitness goal is to be able to lift an adult male, approximately the size of my husband, into the trunk of my car without help.
@PortRooster: Pitbull: Hey, what rhymes with "Kodak"? Nicki Minaj: "Kodak", duh... Pitbull: Thanks!
@Mindless4Miles: DJ: "MARRIED PEOPLE IN THE CLUB TONIGHT MAKE SOME NOOOIISE!" *Groans* *Sobs* *sighs* *a solitary gunshot*