@Bagyants: Shake what yo mama gave you! Oh she just handed you a child. Don't shake that
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@CatherineLMK: "Hi I can't remember the name of this actress.You know her, she's in that movie you saw. She's got that hair." -actual message from my mom
@thedailymarker: Ladies, if all he does is make you cry then maybe you're dating an onion and not a man.
@anjadrisch: My anti bacterial hand wash promises to kill germs & moisturise at the same time. Such violence & nurturing from the one product.
@Fickle_Filly: A starfish has five arms. An anablep has four eyes. An octopus has three hearts. And you've got two faces.